Arrows in the Hand of a Warrior

Read Psalm 127:3-5 

What would you think of a shooting instructor who commanded his students, “Ready! Fire! Aim!”? Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it? Because anyone who’s ever held and fired a gun knows you get ready first, then you determine your target and carefully aim at it, and then you fire the weapon. 

Unfortunately, many parents today seem to operate in the fire-first, aim-later mode. This week’s Bible passage refers to this, except it speaks about bows and arrows rather than guns and ammo. This might not be the first analogy that comes to mind for a new dad and mom, but it’s a valid one. As an old saying reminds us, “If you aim at nothing, you’ll hit it every time.” 

Maybe parents in every generation have felt this way, but it seems the challenges we’re facing today are greater than at any time in the past. With the pressures and distractions of technology, social media and the constant attacks on traditional values, our calling for raising responsible, productive, God-fearing children is confronting more obstacles than ever. 

Too often parents choose to abdicate their own responsibilities, presuming they can rely on schools and the church to provide the necessary training. Unfortunately, much of what is being taught in many schools contradicts what the Lord instructs in His Word, so we can’t trust them to do the job. Even good churches only have our kids an hour or two each week, so the positive impact they can have is small compared to the influences surrounding our kids every day. 

This is why the teaching of Proverbs 22:6 is so profound: “Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.” This isn’t a guarantee that our children will grow up to be devout followers of Jesus and be recognized as godly leaders. However, it is our responsibility to teach them what’s right and true, and to reinforce that by serving as a consistent example of what a man with a heart after God should look like. 

Training our children effectively requires time, effort and intentionality. A well-accepted guideline for goal-setting is to ask and answer three important questions: Where are we going? How are we going to get there? How will we know when we’ve arrived? These also are good questions to consider in developing a strategy for raising children that will know the way they should go – and when they’re old, not depart from it. 

Granted, we don’t have complete control over how our kids will ultimately turn out. God does much of the work, drawing them to Himself and molding their hearts, often using circumstances to get their attention. And kids, especially when they become teenagers and older, need to make their own decisions. Some of which we might not agree with. But then, didn’t we learn to make decisions – by sometimes making bad decisions? 

However, just as the Lord makes us stewards (managers) of the material resources He entrusts to us, we’re also stewards of the children He’s given to us. So, like it or not, we’re to serve as trainers for our youngsters. They’re not going to turn out to be model citizens automatically. 

This instruction will take different forms as our children get older – starting with discipline and correction, then training, coaching, and then friendship. But each phase must be bathed in prayer as we seek the Lord’s wisdom for how to respond the right way to each situation that arises.  

Remember “show and tell” when you were in elementary school? In a sense, parenting also is a show-and-tell endeavor: We show how to do things the right way, including living a life of faith in Christ. This includes praying with our kids and praying to the Lord for them. We tell them what God says in His Word, and we show we believe what it says by living accordingly. 

For many men, their careers are most important. But in reality, if you weren’t around to do your job, they’d find someone else to do it. On the other hand, if you don’t purposefully and intentionally engage with your children as a parent, who’s going to do that job?