Submit to One Another
Read Ephesians 5:18-33
There’s something in the human psyche that finds the word “submit” repulsive. We just don’t want to do it. The Bible explains this is part of our fallen or sinful nature. Even though the Scriptures clearly state there’s only one God – and it’s not us – our natural inclination is to act as if we are our own god, bent on doing things our own way.
I still chuckle at the story of the little boy who was refusing to sit in his car seat. Finally, the father stopped the car, turned around and insisted that his son sit down, or he’d face consequences when they arrived home.
After the father resumed driving, the stubborn little fellow muttered, “I’m sitting down on the outside – but I’m standing up in the inside.” Not exactly a submissive attitude.
As we grow older, the circumstances change but the frame of mind doesn’t. Whether it’s at work, in our homes, or in our everyday activities, we resist being told what we should do. We want to have things on our own terms.
But a genuine encounter with Jesus Christ has a way of changing that. Especially when we grasp that even Jesus Himself understood submission – He didn’t go to the cross because He had nothing else to do that day. In the Garden of Gethsemane, the evening before being crucified, Jesus declared in agonized prayer, “Now My soul is troubled, and what shall I say, ‘Father, save Me from this hour’? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour” (John 12:27). He later added, “No My will, but Your will be done.”
What motivated such selflessness? Love. Jesus died to pay the penalty for our sins, a penalty we could never even conceive of being able to pay.
Most likely, God will not command us to give our lives for Him, although there are many who have done just that rather than to renounce their faith. But the Lord does ask us to submit in other ways: First of all, to Him, being eager to obey His commandments and respond to opportunities for witness and service He sends our way.
Then there’s submission to others, being will to serve them in the name of Christ, even if it means giving up something tangible or offering our time and energy to help whenever the Lord shows us a need we can fill.
And third, there’s submission to our wives. ‘Now just wait a minute!’ someone might protest. ‘Doesn’t it say in Ephesians that wives are to submit to their husbands?’ Yes, it does. Ephesians 5:22 instructs, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.”
‘See!’ But wait a minute. Read what the passage says next. After stating, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church…,” it offers clarification: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). And, as if we need a refresher, how did Jesus love the Church? He gave His life for it – the body of believers – in the most literal sense.
Again, we probably won’t be asked to give up our physical lives for our wives, although that has happened at times. But submitting to our wives means willingness – even a fervent desire – to serve and honor our wives to the best of our ability. Out of love.
This can mean many things: Helping with chores around the house, even after the most demanding workday. Taking care of the kids so she can enjoy some time alone, running errands, getting her nails done or going out to dinner with her girlfriends. Doing something special for her, even when it’s not her birthday or an anniversary. Or taking her out somewhere and giving her your undivided attention, even if it means silencing your phone or not checking the ball scores for a few hours.
How can we live in such a selfless way when, like the little boy, our temptation is to be sitting down on the outside while standing up on the inside? It’s only through the love and power of Christ living in us through His Spirit.
Jesus explained it simply in Luke 9:23, “If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me.” This includes being willing, for the sake of Christ, to be His representative: in the home, in the neighborhood, at work, and anywhere else God sees fit to send us.
As the apostle Paul said, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).